Sunday, November 28, 2010

I staged a Protest Once.


When I was 5 I decided I needed to get off my butt and get active in important issues so while other people were hugging trees and walking naked pretending to be worried about animals being used for fur I looked around and picked chickens!  I say pretend because many a nudist camps opened their gates and said .. "go run free, run wild .. if you get stopped just hold up this sign - I'd rather be naked than wear fur - say you know Naomi Campbell personally and PETA PETA PETA all over the place" these people did not care one schmick about animals they just wanted to let it all hang out  .. and over ..and all about in some cases.


I felt sorry for the chickens and when I spoke to them about wanting to take on their plight they thought it was absolutely ducky.


So I studied the most effective ways of demonstrating and decided I would march into chicken hell, get everyones attention with some nice song and dance and then lay it on them ....

I picked "Goodbye Earl" cause it was sung by The Dixie CHICKS and someone gets killed in it and it is a good dance number in case the crowd wanted to start line dancing and I figured any song with a banjo in it is bound to disarm people ... lull them into a false sense of good will ...

So I put on my tutu, my tap shoes, my bolero with chicken feathers (donated not plucked), taped empty walnut shells to my fingers to use as castanets and took my little stereo into the midst of the crowd and started the music and danced until I was sure everyone was paying attention.  Then I stopped the music and cleared my throat and demanded...

"CONSIDER THE PLIGHT OF THE POOR CHICKEN ... how would you like to be in their shoes?  (someone yelled out .. "they don't wear shoes"  but I was undeterred and a little dizzy from all that dancing) I said, "I dream of a world where one day Chickens will be able to come out from under the shadow of discrimination.  I ask you , when have you ever actually seen a hen peck a husband.  Let the man or woman who has actually seen that with your own eyes come forward NOW!" ...... (no-one moved .. they were rivetted .. I had made a very valuable point ...)

I continued,  "I dream of a day where Chickens will be allowed to cross the road freely without having their motives questioned and scrutinized.  Do any of YOU ever have to justify why YOU cross the road?"


I had a bunch more to say but evidently one of the people complained that while I was dancing I had flamico'd in his mashed potatoes and Kentucky Fried Chicken has a "no feet in the potato policy" that they strictly enforce.  I learned that day the importance of positive demonstrating as opposed to negative and I never used the Dixie Chicks again .. instead I started a Chicken celebration night that is now used all over the world right before we sacrifice the bride ... it is called "Hens Night."

SKIN: Glam Affair
LASHES: Redgrave
OUTFIT: Ranena Olivier Couture
SHOES: Ranena Olivier Couture
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