Friday, January 14, 2011

Never Get Your Hair Done When On Holidays.


I went to get my hair done when we were on holidays and my hubby was like .. Just pick one, any one, I can't drive round the street for hours you know … look there is one now "Betty's Glamour House."


ARE you freaking kidding me??? Do you want me to die?

What?? How could you die getting your hair done?

"OMG do you live under a rock or something … GLAMOUR .. GLAMMMMMOUR ….hello Vampires????  Do you even love me at all?

"Can I have a few moments to think about that one?"

"Sure I go in there and they MAYBE even bother doing my hair, my nails whatever, but then they will probably like drink my blood and then glamour me to make me forget it happened and I probably will even hate the hair do and they will make me think it looks ok and like you will be no help because no matter what you just go .. "ya that looks great babe," .... do you have any idea how much I hate that???  How lousy it makes me feel?  And in this case I could be wandering the streets feeling faint from the lack of blood with a really bad hair do and not even knowing what was happening. I CANNOT FREAKING believe you sometimes …"

"Ok look look .. I am soooo sorry. I don't know what I was thinking … I promise to never say I like your hair again.  I obviously do not know Betty like you do, I mean I had no idea she was a vampire .. .. Please quit screaming and come in off the roof of the car before you fall …. look I am pulling over, … let go Bliss, let me just pry your fingers here …. look no "glamour salon" .. we are not even near it … if anyone named Betty even thinks of looking at you I have a stake right in the glove box ready … PULLLEAASE get back into the car…"


Well .. we finally found a decent place … "Mabels Hair Cuttery .. You grow 'em, we mow 'em, " and I was able to get my hair done without any "glamouring" going on.  Men, I don't know .. they just do not understand how hypervigilant we women have to be these days .. everyone wants us.

My hubby picked me up, obviously very ashamed of himself.  He handed me the stake to hold and was very intent on his driving.  He took me to a nice quiet place in the country and drove me straight up the driveway of a lovely old church like building.  Then it gets kind of foggy for me.  There was screaming and doors slamming and the car roof again and a crowd in white nighties with their butt cheeks flapping in the breeze chanting "jump jump jump" and some really large people in crisp white uniforms.  I think my hubby was trying to tell me something but I could barely hear him on account of some 300 lb nurse guy named Marv had me in a headlock and was pulling me from the car but I think my hubby said something like once they get me admitted and hosed down, we will have a nice long talk about appropriate television watching.

SKIN: Fhang Candy
LASHES: Amacci
HAIR: JE Republic
BOOTS: Mentine
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