Monday, August 8, 2011

Childhood is Wasted On Children.


You know how parents always are telling you ... "you will thank me one day for this" right before they make you do something awful like go to bed at 6:00, or remove your tonsils, or make you go and play with that kid down the street you despise?


I mean why do they get to choose what "childhood experiences" are to be meaningful to you later in life?

Which is why the other day when mom was shopping with me, and refused to buy me the designer dress I saw and hinted and hinted that I would LOVE to own ... I lay down on the floor and screamed and threw the BEST TANTRUM EVER!!!!!!

If you think a two-year old tantrum is impressive you should see a middle aged woman's!!!

AND the reaction of people ... EVEN BETTER!!! Mom kept begging me to get up off he floor as the crowd grew. I just kicked and screamed louder ... "YOU NEVER BUY ME ANYTHING ... I WAS THE ONLY GIRL WITHOUT A KEN DOLL AND NOW THIS ONE DRESS AND I JUST WANTED A PRETTY DRESS FOR ONCE ...TELL ME WHY ...WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH??? YOU ALWAYS BUY BIFF DRESSES. YOU LOVE HIM BEST!!"

I mean at 2, someone can pick you up and take you to the car and spank you and the best tantrums can be completely snuffed. Older, heavier, and with human rights on your side .. you have bargaining power. She finally RAN to grab the dress and take it to the cash register and then ran back to show me she bought it.

I got up and smiled and hugged her. The crowd cheered and clapped ...


Oh ... my mom is never going shopping with me again and she is not speaking to me!! (thank heavens - she always drags me to look at sturdy underwear and sensible shoes ...) BUT I made her a nice home made card (again those childhood skills .. WIN!!) and sent her that "Thank YOU" she has been saying I would one day give her. I have taken things from my childhood and applied them to my life and the world is a better place for it ... at least my world for the next while....

SKIN: Filthy
HAIR: Elikatira
EYES: Fashism
EARRINGS: Finesmith
SKIRT: Sassy
POSES: Del May
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