Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Where is Hallmark When You Really Need It?
Hubby came in from mowing the lawn yesterday ... he had a confession.
While mowing the lawn near to the boundary line between the perving "I hate you because you looked at me once and I could tell you were thinking bad thoughts" neighbour he ran over a huge cane toad, split it opened and the mower spewed all over the driveway of the neighbour.
Normally when these things happen (much more often than you might think) you would go and get the hose and clean off the neighbours driveway, however, when one's neighbour has spent the last 6 years trying out for the "neighbour from hell" international award ... one must pause before one attempts good will. Your very life might depend upon it. You see this neighbour has motion detectors and laser activated machine guns with our names on them. We already narrowly escaped death when we once called the spca to save their dog when they were out one day and the dog got its neck caught under the fence. Who knew that they wanted the dog to die ...
We hear them screaming at their grandkids NOT to EVER set foot on our property as we are evil. We have seen him push them out of the way when they block his view as he pervs on us through the trees. So you see ... we could not, under any circumstances, clean his driveway.
Instead we stood at the window, noses pressed, watching the sun bake the decimated toad onto his driveway.
For the love of God there has to be a card somewhere that adequately expresses the right sentiment in these situations. "With Sympathy .... The Toad now splayed all over your yard did not suffer. It was quick. Still, we know this is a difficult time..." or maybe "So Sorry, there just are no words at this time to tell you how very sorry we are for all the blood and guts we sprayed all over your driveway ...."
I would even settle for a gift certificate for the "Cane Toads are Us" store but I searched the internet and there just are NO cane toad gift baskets or anything ....
All we can do now is wait for the repercussions ... I am having nightmares ... flashbacks to the movie "Carrie" at the prom.
Pray for us.
SKIN: *JeSyLiLO*:::Kuwait National day:::*LightSkin*
EYES: ! IKON 'Sunrise' Eyes - Clove Green Pale
LASHES: Amacci ~ Prim Lashes "Allure"
JEWELLERY: $GaNKeD$ Falling Star Jewelry Set Peridot
FEATHER HEADBAND: ::SPLIT PEA:: Sugar Lick Me Up - Hat V1
DRESS: Paris Metro Couture: Moluin Rouge Cocktail Noir (B)
LEGGINGS: A&A Fashion Leggings
SHOES: Stiletto Moody Bare Anita
CHAISE LOUNGE AND POSES: [LA] Dressing Room Dormeuse / Blue