Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Birthday Parties and Snakes.


I recently attended a birthday party for a little girl here in Australia. There was lots of pink and purple and balloons and dolls and cupcakes and darling little kids and everyone was doing the little girl's birthday polite social routine.


You know, parents visiting and talking while children race around the house making sure the sugar gets fully pumped into every sqaure inch of their body so that they can bounce off the interior of the van on the way home and not injure themselves....

It seemed so innocent and sweet. It seemed so sane. The children were darling.  We were in a normal suburban neighbourhood. Everyone had their clothes on.  They had orange pop for crying out loud ... and then ....

... out came the snakes. Yup, snakes. And even the baby ran for them, insisting she not be left out. I tried to entice her back with some pretty beads she could wear around her neck instead of a huge slimy snake but I am not sure she saw my hand waving at her from underneath the table like that ...

And everyone held a snake and "oohed" and "aahed" and draped them around themselves and had their pics taken despite the screaming coming from somewhere under the table. I think the screams were coming from me but I can't be completely sure as there was at least one other lady and this really tall guy under there with me ... fear knows no gender. He and the other lady were just holding one another and crying most of the time.

I would have made a break for the door but there were at least two children and their snakes between me and the door and the snakes kept looking over their shoulders and eyeing the table. They knew ... of course they knew ...snakes know everything. The know where the scaredy cats are and that is the first place they slither to when given the chance. It makes them feel powerful. I also was not sure I could throw the tall guy at the snake if I had to.

I knew that throwing children was prohibited.

I wanted to stand up and slap them all silly and tell them that these were snakes for crying out loud and not fluffy kittens. Where were the fluffy kittens???? Little girls were supposed to have pics taken with fluffy kittens NOT snakes!!! I wanted to but I didn't ...


... because I had peed my pants.

I will never be fooled by pretty pink barbie invitations ever again. Barbie is evil. Australians are whacked and no amount of cake and orange pop can make up for the trauma I suffered.

I am pretty sure that tall guy is still under the table.

I hope enough carrot sticks fell on the floor for him to survive.

SKIN: [ Al Vulo! ] - [ Leilani] - [ - gold fish ] group gift
HAIR: Alli&Ali Hair Alma Cinamon
EYES: ! IKON 'Sunrise' Eyes - Gaelic Silver Pale
LASHES: *ByKay* ~ Eyelashes ~ *Flair*
JEWELLERY: *ByKay* ~ Kalya ~ *Green*
PURSE: Muism Messenger Bag Green
DRESS: MM Shiny White Ensemble
CORSET: MM Shiny White Corset
SHOES: Manba Mood.a_Sphera Shoes
LOCATION: Mysterious Dream

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