Thursday, June 12, 2014

Not For The Eyes of Children.

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My grandparents were always screaming at us kids to keep our feet off the couch.

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Which is kind of hard when you are a little kid, being as they are attached to your legs and when you sit on the couch your legs end halfway from the back of the couch to the edge of the couch.  Like hey  ... if I put my feet on the floor, I am standing.

Just thought I would point that out.  Not to be technical or anything ... but it must make you feel kind of like an idiot to have a two year old point out something so obvious?  But seriously, you keep on yelling all parent like.

My brother always thought he was the couch monitor or something - probably the most prestigious job he ever held .. well the one with the most responsibility.  He watched like a hawk and reported anyone whose foot was moving in the general direction of the couch.

I loved it when he reported Aunt Margaret ... I was hoping I would get to watch when she got taken to the back bedroom and the belt came off.  She frequently put her feet on the couch but no-one said it at our house.  She was lucky because one day at her house I was pretty sure Uncle Bill had caught her and was really fed up.

One minute they were out sitting on the couch, she had her feet on it and then they disappeared.  I found them in the bedroom.  The door was open slightly.  She was obviously about to get one heck of a spanking.  Uncle Bill took his belt off.  She lifted up her skirt ... and then he took off his pants ....


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 . . . and that was the last thing I remember before my grandmother screamed, hands were clamped over my eyes, a door was slammed and I was "tansported" outside in like a nanosecond of a nanosecond.

Evidently watching adults punish the adults is not something children should watch.

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