Saturday, February 7, 2015

Peeling Back The Layers of Friendship.

a little slip 1

You know that one "friend" we all have.  Well, I am not completely convinced she is anyone's friend.  She is always there, always front and centre but who really brought her?  And who really knows her .. no wait ... WANTS to know her?

a little slip 2

She's the one who watches around the table in the lunchroom when someone peels their banana and then laughs hysterically and says "You don't seriously peel your banana THAT way do you?"  And banana woman shares looks with the other women at the table like rolling your eyes only NOT rolling your eyes.  Women who are really accomplished know how to do that and only other accomplished women can see it.  Yes, Ninja women  live and breathe among us and have super powers.

And banana woman says of course she peels it that way, doesn't everybody?  And the unwanted woman laughs hysterically and pretends to be shocked when everyone agrees with banana woman.  "OMG you guys are too cute.  Years ago, when I was 12 and hiked by myself from Wisconsin to jungles of Africa and lived off the land for a year I studied the monkeys and learned the proper way to eat bananas.  You NEVER peel it THAT way.  That is just sooo silly but typical of the gaps in our antiquated education system.  I mean, do they ever teach anything really important?   You peel it from the OTHER end and then that way you never get those annoying strings.  Monkeys hate strings and well ... I just assumed everyone had been to Africa, survived the jungle with the monkeys, and knew these things.  I'm so sorry.  I have to keep reminding myself how exceptional I am.  Think about it, the monkeys know that basic logic and we human beings, well YOU human beings, don't.  Isn't that hysterical?"  

More super women ninja powered eye rolling.

Banana woman was picking the banana strings out of her teeth.

Why do these woman always have big breasts, perfect teeth and great hair?  She stood up and pitched her garbage into the pin, from beyond the 3 pointer line, swishing it through, all net.   We all just sat there having a telepathic planning meeting on ways to dispose of a body after you kill somebody.

a little slip 3

The really annoying thing is that the next morning when I went to eat my banana I looked at it, and yes, I turned it over, and tried to peel it from the other end.  By the time I made a crack in the banana skin where I could begin peeling, the banana was basically mush that oozed out into my hand and dropped onto the floor.

When I ran into her in the office she homed in on me like a carrier pigeon in heat.  She smiled at me and asked if I had lost weight and then pointed out I had banana on my shoe.

I hate that bitch.

SKIN:  DeeTaleZ Skin A.T.W. Kimber [Makeup] Mixedtype
HAIR:  [LeLutka]-FRANCINE hair/Naturals
EYES:  Ibanez Ltd Edition Natural  Eyes - Ebony
LASHES:  Angel Rock Eyelash J curl Philisha Lashes
MAKE-UP:  .:Glamorize:. Champagne Combos 1 - 3 Tattoo Makeup Co
JEWELLERY:  Gems & Kisses - Extreme Nobility - Gold - Miniset  (closed)
RING:  Bubblez BB - Treble Ring
NAIL POLISH:  *MC* Slink Avatar Enhancement Nails - Lovely Solids Set
OUTFIT:  PICHI - ELEONORA Outfit [red/black]
PURSE:  welldone.atelier /  Clutch /  red
SHOES:  SLink Sydney II Stilettos Red
POSES:  Posies  ANTM Brittany 2, ANTM Bianca, ANTM Shandi 2
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