Tuesday, August 11, 2015

If You Chance to See a Frown

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"If You Chance to See a Frown, do not let it stay
Quickly turn it upside down and smile that frown away."

My grandmother was always singing me little songs with messages and hidden meanings.   I think she attended a parenting school where she majored in, "Sing it to them and they will have the lesson for life."

I am reporting back after my experience with the brainwashing that failed.

I did not learn the lesson.  I learned that I hated rhymey, singsongy, myopic tunes with words attached that a grownup lacked the ability to speak, plainly and simply.   In this case, "stop frowning," would have covered it all, kept people's sanity, and may have put off therapy and the final outcome where I hated my parents.


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I actually started to take the songs as a challenge.  I was trying to find ways of complying so that they could not angry with me, but still underscored that their communication technique was ineffective and possibly even dangerous.  They assumed, from this song, that someone would understand they should turn the corners of their mouths up, instead of down - hence turning the frown upside down and making it a smile.

I stood on my head on the coffee table, in front of all the guests, including the minister.  My crinolines fell towards my head, exposing my panties with the hole where "Sunday" was once embroidered.  That concerned another adult direction, not sung, but equally deserving of someone to mess with it.  My grandmother gave me the whole thing about wearing clean underwear, "in case something happened." Of course she meant, in case I was in an accident and had to go to the hospital and the doctors were so horrified I was wearing dirty underwear that they refused to stop the bleeding from my broken leg and severed femoral artery.  Happens all the time.  Who can look at anything else when dirty underwear is in the room?  Anyway, I ripped off "Sunday" and when my grandmother demanded to know why, I told her I had to.  It was Friday.  What if the ambulance people were called, and I had dirty underwear AND the wrong day?  They would either think I was stupid or could not read.  I did it for her.  For her and her severe sensibilities concerning the thoughts of other people and what they might think of us. . . and ultimately . ..  her.  

She doubted my sincerity but I assured her my caring what people thought of me, or the family for that matter, paled in comparison to her heroic efforts.

Of course when you get older you actually care about wearing clean underwear, " in case something happens."   But THAT kind of "something" usually involves the back seat of the car and was not an accident unless it only happened because both of you were really drunk and would never have gone there otherwise.  While my grandmother was talking about a "something" no-one wanted to happen, I am talking about a "something" that, depending on my date, seemed like a really good thing.

So I stood on my head, ripped panties showing, with technically a smile on my face where a frown once lay.  Except I never actually surrendered the frown.  I thought it would be a win win.  My grandmother saw a smile and I would be allowed my own emotions independent from those demanded of me in a song by grandparents who really were not that into raising me but at the same time could not bear to have anyone know that.  In order to do that, I had to learn to behave, senior citizen style. 

I actually felt badly for them.  They should have traded me in. 

She did prove one thing though, I am not sure anyone even noticed the "smile" . . . Turns out underwear, even undirty underwear, is pretty much a show stopper.

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At least my show stopped, for about 2 weeks . . .  in my room ...  without TV .


SKIN:  .::WoW Skins::. Virginia, SWANK EVENT
BODY:  Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara
HAIR:  Moon. Hair // - FATPACK - Moonlight
EYES:  Egozy..Eyes Intense Collection
LASHES:  ATIA's Whisper Lashes
RIBBON:   Bowtique  - Sash Accessory
BRACELETS and RING:  Bowtique - Love & Hearts Bracelet/Ring Set
DRESS:  Kaithleen's Elena Dress - Red
SHOES:  [hh] Maitreya Haven Classic Pumps
POSES:    Morgana Batista
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